How to Quiet a Complainer
Talking to a complainer can stress you out, but with the right tools you can lighten the mood for all.
. Some complainers will stop if you change the conversation in a direction that interests them. If your neighbor is caring much about the phone company, tell her about an unexpected call you received from an old friend. If you coworker is complaining about your boss, ask whether he met the new employee.. Therefore, you can keep using it.
Summarize the complaint. If your complainer keeps repeating himself, he may stop if you prove that you're listening. Ask something like, "Can I tell you what I've heard so far and you know that I've got it?" Using "I" statements ("I've heard…") rather than "you" statements shows that you're interested rather than trying to shut the person down..
Challenge the person to act. When a complainer is always telling you about her latest problem, ask nicely what she's done to improve it. That isn't the usual direction that a complaining conversation takes..
Be honest. When you have things to do, tell the complainer that you must cut the conversation short. . You can simply be honest, even saying you need to move on so the conversation doesn't bring you down—especially if it's someone who's complained to you many times before.
A. Change the subject
B. Continue the subject
C. You don't need an excuse to stop it
D. Therefore, you can keep complaining it
E. Hard as it may be, avoid saying the word "you"
F. However, this direction may help to shortly end a complaint
G. This method is especially effective on those who are mindlessly expressing
