Years ago I had a falling-out with a friend due to a misunderstanding that was completely my fault. I was afraid to 1 that I was wrong, so we hadn't spoken for years. Then we bumped into each other and decided to meet for lunch. It was so 2 that we kept meeting. After two or three meals together I felt forced to apologize for my 3 years earlier.
My experience isn't unique. Many people 4 apologizing because the idea of admitting to wrongdoing makes them 5 uncomfortable. Apologies force us to admit to ourselves that we don't always 6 our standards. We might also fear that the victim(受害者) won't 7 our apology. We all like to 8 ourselves as good people—as kind, considerate and moral. For these 9, an apology can be very difficult to give.
Given my experience, there is no 10 that an apology is an important tool for 11 relationship to make it functional again. Usually a(n) 12 apology is called for, but if the victim is angry at the wrong behavior, it may be more 13 to wait, because their 14 may stop them from accepting our apologies. Also a delay 15 an apology's effectiveness because it conveys that the offender has time to reflect on his/her 16. But a heartfelt apology has more powerful effects, which can improve our mental health and repair our 17 personal relationships. 18, expressing regret and acknowledging responsibility are also vital. Without 19, it's a good reason of your actions; without responsibility, it's an excuse.
My friend and I had lunch recently 15 years after my belated apology. Admitting that everything had been my fault helped us heal our relationship. We're both 20 to have our friendship today.
