There are many differences in the way different cultures raise kids. International visitors notice the fact that children are special in China. However, the way some Chinese people treat these very special kids may shock some foreign visitors.
When I told a Chinese mother her child was beautiful, I was nonplussed when she replied, "No, she's not；she's ugly."
Since that time I have heard many similar comments（评论）, including, "No, he's not bright; he's stupid." This is a huge cultural difference that needs to be understood when you talk about kids with your international visitors.
Someone explained it to me, "We Chinese don't want to appear too proud." I'm sure there are other people in the world who feel the same way, but most people in my country would consider you a terrible parent if you said your kid was stupid or ugly. They would think you were breaking the child's self-confidence. When we Americans say something good about our child, we don't think we are being proud because we are saying it about the child, not about ourselves. In this way, we separate the child from the parent as two different persons.
You may think I sound too proud when I freely say to another westerner: "My daughter is smart and pretty." Of course, I still have to teach her not to be proud, but I can be proud of her. It's just the way she was made, and I'm thankful for that.
So, in the US when we say something nice about our own kids, it is not considered being too proud but rather, being thankful and being a good parent.
