To those normal kids, it's not unusual to hear "Goodnight" when you kiss them, saying "Goodnight" to them. For most parents, it's just a storm in a teacup. However, for me it's opposite.
My son James, suffered from the autism spectrum disorder (ASD), a developmental disability caused by differences in the brain. Some people with ASD may have advanced conversation skills whereas James is an exception.
Pre-diagnosis, I'd give James a big kiss and whisper goodnight when putting James to bed. Post-diagnosis, the silence that I received in return was deafening. It had never occurred to me before to be concerned that when I said" Goodnight, James. I love you", my toddler said nothing in response.
I needed to hear him say something. My husband and 1 began to promote James to say goodnight back to us. "Say goodnight, Mommy. " For over a year, "Say goodnight, Mommy" was the parting routine of the day. Every night, it made me cry. I never got used to it. But I never gave up hope.
With more efforts one night, I'd hear something more organic come out of James's mouth. He dropped the "say"—and his response became "goodnight, Mommy" when James turned four. It was fantastic—but it was still prompted. At six, I got my first unprompted, "Goodnight, Mommy. I love you "Next to my wedding, and births of my children, this was the most exciting night of my life.
James, now eight, routinely kisses us goodnight and tells us he loves us. The other evening, after giving me a big hug and kiss. James told me, "You're a great mom! You're not a mom with feathers, or a mom with colors and markers. I'm glad you're a…a person!" I don't know if he had the book Are You My Mather? on his mind, or if this was just one of the many random thoughts that crossed my son's brain on a daily basis. 1 do know it was music to my ears.
