Psychologists tell us our self-image defines what we believe we can and cannot do. Each of us over the years has built up belief about ourselves. Unconsciously, our pictures of who we are have been formed by past experiences. Our successes and failures, what others have told us and what we think people believe about us all help form impressions of what we think we are. Because self-image is so important in our growth, it is important to examine our concepts of self in order to reach our full potential.
Changing our self-image is possible. Some psychologists suggest we begin to change our self-image by mentally picturing ourselves performing well at some task. Since we presently react to things based on our present images, it's suggested that we replace those with better ones. In many experiments, people were asked to sit quietly for a few minutes each day and imagine themselves doing well. For instance, subjects would sit and imagine themselves throwing darts at a bull's-eye on a target. Over a period of weeks, their dart game improved. This has been done with people who wanted to play chess better, throw a ball more accurately, increase their salesmanship or musical talents, and improve many other skills. In most cases, remarkable improvement is made.
The point of changing self-image is not to develop an image of ourselves that is not real. To try to become something we really aren't is just as wrong as living the unrealistic, inferior image we may have. The aim is to find the real self, to bring our mental images of ourselves in line with our true potential. However, it is generally accepted among psychologists that most of us fail to do justice to ourselves. We're usually better than we think we are.
Another important part of changing self-image is to not think about past mistakes. Don't let failures do harm. Our errors or humiliation over mistakes are necessary steps in learning. It is all right to make mistakes. But when they have taught us what we did wrong, we should forget them and not dwell on them. Sometimes we keep remembering our failures or mistakes and feel guilty or embarrassed about them. We let them take over, and then we develop a fear.
It is important to have realistic expectations of ourselves. Some of our dissatisfaction might come from expecting too much of ourselves. If we demand constant perfection in everything we do, we can be disappointed and our poor self-image will continue. If our goal is to reach perfection, we are doomed from the start.
