For many of us, asking for help is a difficult concept. We may feel as if we are admitting a weakness that world would not have known about, had we not asked for help.
However, people who are able to deliver well-positioned requests for help are often seen as very strong individuals. When they demonstrate the humility (谦卑) to ask for help, they earn the respect of others. People who receive a heartfelt request for help are usually honored by the request. In turn, we are strengthened by the very help that is provided.
One of my clients named Kira recently made a shift in how she was interacting with her boss. When asked to prepare presentations, she assumed that she was expected to develop the content, deliver it at the required meeting and then wait for feedback from her boss. However, Kira recognized that she had not yet made use of her boss's support. She could learn far more about creating attractive presentations by walking through a draft with her boss and obtaining feedback earlier in the process rather than at the back end. So she made the request for his support.
The outcome? Her boss was delighted to coach Kira and was enthusiastic about teaching presentation skills to her. By taking the time to work together on presentation for a number of Kira's key presentations, she benefited from her boss's thought process and thus improved her own presentations. Kira's presentations now have punch!
Some of us are uncomfortable asking for help because we believe that our request places burdens on the other person. However, we may miss an opportunity to show others how we value and respect them. People who know you and think well of you are often highly motivated to help. Furthermore, the more specific you can be about what you need from them, the easier it is for them to assist you.
