Two students started quarrelling at school. One student shouted dirty words at the other, and a fight began.
What can be done to stop fights like this at school? In some schools, the disputants(争执者) sit down with peer mediators(调解者). Peer mediators are students with special training in this kind of problems.
Peer mediators help the disputants to talk in a friendly way. Here are some of the ways they use:
1)Put what you think clearly but don't say anything to hurt the other. Begin with "I feel…" instead of "You always…"
2) Listen carefully to what the other person is saying. Don't stop the other person's words.
3) Keep looking at the other person's eyes when he or she talks.
4) Try to see the other person's side of the problem.
5) Never put anyone down. Saying things like "You are foolish" makes the talk difficult.
6)Try to find a result that makes both people happy.
Peer mediators never decide the result of the winner. They don't decide who is right and who is wrong. Instead, they help the two students to find their own "win-win" result. A "win-win" result can make everyone feel good.
Peer mediators' work is often successful just because it gets people to talk to each other. And getting people to talk to each other is the first step in finding a "win-win" result.