Friends are important in our lives. But not all of friends stand the test of time. We spoke about friendships with Marisa Franco, writer of the book How Can You Make And Keep Friends. Here are four tips to remember if you' re losing a friend.
Accept changes in life
Losing friends is a part of life. Franco said: " Nobody really wants the friendship to end, but people get busy and can' t keep the friendship any more. " It doesn' t mean we are not qualified(合格的) friends. Instead, it makes us value what we have at present.
" When being with friends, the relationship will get worse if you keep leaving something unsaid instead of communicating with each other positively(积极地). " Franco said. We might be afraid of
having arguments. But if we think about it and talk in peace, it can be a sign that you care enough to fix the friendship.
Allow yourselfto feel sad
Allow yourself to feel those feelings and be patient with yourself. Francc said, " When society doesn' t value a relationship that you' re losing, you have trouble grieving. " It makes the grief last longer. We should think like " Of course, I' m sad, I lost someone I' m close to" . Instead of being like " What' s wrong with me?" " And you can' t put a timeline on grief. Grief is just a process of feeling emotion over time. " Franco said.
Be kind to yourself along the way
Franco said it' s important to forgive(原谅) yourself for not getting over the loss of a friendship. But don' t go into a new friendship feeling afraid. " Your understanding of friendship in your brain isn' t just colored by this one experience. " Franco said.
A. Make the unsaid said. B. Things just keep coming and going. C. Solve problems as quickly as possible. D. One way to make you feel better again is to make new friends. E. Normally, when a friendship ends, there is a process of feeling sad. |
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