When I was in senior high school, I was scared of writing application letters. One of my biggest fears was the fear of rejection. Keeping myself in a safe space and doing things that I know I can perform well was my favorite pastime. But I knew I had to make a change, so I tried to apply for the college myself.
When I received the first reply letter, I was taking a class then. My heart was beating wildly while I waited for the school internet to connect faster. When I saw the letter starting with "Thank you for your application. After a careful review...", I felt my face growing hotter. Although it was a college I was not thinking of going to even if I did get in, I was heart-broken.
This fear is applicable anywhere else: the fear of having your projects or ideas rejected or even the fear of being rejected from your friend group, to name but a few. I cannot tell you how many times I passed up the opportunity because I always thought there were better applicants out there, and for this reason, I missed out on so many opportunities to grow.
Even nowadays, when I get a rejection letter from a scholarship application, I have the same immediate reaction, no matter how many rejections I've gone through. But the aftermath(创伤) does get easier Every time I am rejected, I am able to bounce back and hand in another application more quickly. Along the journey of rejections, I realize that I am not incompetent, but that everyone else maybe more capable. And that is okay.
This fear will never truly go away. I'm still terrified to write and publish my articles. But it is thrilling to know that I write what I want to say, explore my mind and learn more about myself. Uncertainty is scary, but without experiencing the scariness, we would never grow, would we?
