Friends are important in our lives. But not all of friends stand the test of time. We spoke about friendships with Marisa Franco, writer of the book How Can You MakeAnd Keep Friends.
Accept changes in life
Things just keep coming and going. Franco said: "Nobody really wants the friendship to end, but people get busy and can't keep the friendship any more." It doesn't mean we are not qualified (合格的) friends. Instead, it makes us value what we have at present.
"When being with friends, the relationship will get worse if you keep leaving something unsaid instead of communicating with each other positively (积极地)." Franco said. We might be afraid of having arguments. But if we think about it and talk in peace, it can be a sign that you care enough to fix the friendship.
Allow yourself to feel sad
Normally, when a friendship ends, there is a process of feeling sad. Allow yourself to feel those emotions and be patient with yourself. The way society views friendships may make your sadness last longer. When a friendship ends, you are questioned, "Sorry for your loss, but why are you still in a bad mood?" Then you think "Is it wrong to feel sad?" Of course, you are upset, which means you love your friend deeply. "And you can't put a timeline on your sadness. Sadness is just a process of feeling emotion over time." Franco said.
Be kind to yourself along the way
It's important to forgive (原谅) yourself for not getting over the loss of a friendship. But don't go into a new friendship feeling afraid. "Your understanding of friendship in your brain isn't just colored by this one experience." Franco said.
A．Make the unsaid said. B．Losing friends is a part of life. C．Solve problems as quickly as possible. D．One way to make you feel better again is to make new friends. E．Come on, you lost someone you are close to. F. Here are four tips to remember if you're losing a friend. |
微信扫码预览、分享更方便
