Children often suffer pain and insecurity when their parents separate.When my ex-husband and I split up after 10 years of marriage,our daughter was 5 years old and my son only 3.We decided to consult a psychologist about the best way to explain this new situation to the children.
She shared with us this special story about a land turtle and a sea turtle,which we then used to help them better comprehend. Once upon a time,a land turtle (Mommy) met a sea turtle (Daddy) close to a beautiful shore.Soon they fell deeply in love and decided to get married.For a time,they continued to live at the water's edge so that Mommy could sit on the sand and keep dry and warm,while Daddy sat in the shallow water to keep cool.A few years later two baby turtles arrived (you both!).They were very special indeed and looked a little like each of their parents.
But as the years went by,Daddy sea turtle started spending more and more time in the ocean as he traveled deeper and deeper to look for pearls.Mommy land turtle also started wandering up into the sands to hunt for food in the woods.Little by little,Daddy and Mommy turtle started to drift further and further apart.Finally one day,Mommy and Daddy turtle decided they didn't want to live together anymore.The little turtles continued to spend time with each of their parents.They made lots of friends with all the fish,dolphins and whales in the ocean and also many friends with the rabbits,deer,and foxes in the woods.In fact they grew up to be a new kind of turtle that could live both in the ocean and on the land.
Over the years,this tale of the land and sea turtle has helped my children cope with and accept the fact that my marriage to their father was over.They know that we once loved each other very much and they were born out of true love.
