It's not just your mom's arbitrary rule; across cultures and throughout history, elbows(手肘) on the table have long been considered unacceptable behavior. Indeed, the Bible warns of putting your elbows on the table, and in 1530, Dutch philosopher Erasmus repeated the same rule. Even the etiquette(礼节) experts don't advise it. So, why have elbows on the table always been considered rude?
For earlier civilizations, this rule functioned to prevent possible violence at the table." Table manners prevented us from leaving our space and starting a" fight. It was important that people saw you-as considerate or trying hard," says Margaret Visser, author of The Rituals of Dinner. Our place setting's fork and knife already act as an imaginary boundary for bur space at the table, so ignoring" or breaking that border indicates that you have no regard for order and are therefore potentially mentally ill-who: knows what else you're capable of!
Today, while keeping your elbows off the table can't be traced back' to a single culture or civilization, it more belongs to the universal language of principle, which expresses two ideas, that at mealtime one shouldn't do anything that inconveniences other diners, and that a meal is a formal occasion where' one shouldn't behave in a casual way.
However, that's not to say that in the here and now leaving your' elbows on the" table will bring dishonor upon your family. Manners develop with the times to meet our needs and feelings. In fact, some body language now suggests that elbows on the table are a sign of appearing engaged and focused on the conversation at hand.
Above all, being considerate, respectful, 'and honest is more important 'than knowing which fork to use. Whether it's a handshake or a hug, it's the sincerity behind and good intentions of the action that matter most
