The extremely cold winter greets me as I start going to the Smithsonian subway and take a moment to look at how empty the capital Washington is. Ten minutes later, I arrive at Union Station, which is almost empty. The public-address system tells me the time table of the train, but I fear it is being played for an audience of one. I silently begin to weep, and then my tears start to break down my emotional dam.
For me, everything changed on March 8, 2020. I was in my office at 2:00 P. M. when one of my leaders announced that we were to immediately leave the building and wait for further instructions. For two hours, I sat on a bench on Constitution Avenue, my heart racing.
I didn't have any real experience working from home. Then one day I did. I held out hope that this would last a few weeks. This, of course, is when everything changed. I started to get really frightened. I watched the news trying to learn every detail. The number of infections kept increasing: 25,000 dead. We soon passed 100,000. It was like watching a disaster movie.
It has been almost one year since the pandemic(大流行病)began. It has a great influence on me because my life is all about routines, sometimes to the extreme. I have always been a social person, even though I stutter(口吃). Now, I wasn't allowed to socialize. I had no problem wearing a mask every time I went out. But I couldn't stand being unable to shake hands and hug. My depression started to throw me into a world of darkness.
However, I know something is wrong and I need to reach out for help. The late singer Bob Marley said, "You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." How true that is, and it was especially meant for times like these.
In many ways, the pandemic has forced me to count my gratitude. To begin with, I have a job. I work in a city that means a great deal to me personally, where I feel safe and no one judges me because of my disabilities. My friends in the stuttering community have continually helped me get through rough time I have had.
Perhaps the most important thing of all is that I've reconnected with my family. We haven't always had an easy relationship, and at times we have been distant. However, sometimes it takes sufferings to rebuild new bonds.
Toughness and gratitude…Never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined that a virus would make me thankful, but it has made me see life in a new way.
